Weekend Getaways

Who wouldn't be amazed and curious upon seeing this beautiful picture of an island? Well, I'm proud to share to you that this wonderful island is located in the Philippines! Come on! Who wants to join me visit this heavenly-looking island? The Bellaroca Island Resort and Spa, Marinduque Philippines.

It has been 2 and a half weeks since the last time that I posted in my blog. I really don’t know why. Or should I say, I’ve been lazy internalizing thoughts, exhausted of too much thinking related to my previous blog post, busy embracing positive vibes and aura from friends, and maybe because I’ve been through a lengthy time bounty of eat out with the family and absolute bonding. Ohh yeah, it’s okay to be envious. Haha! No. Of course you shouldn’t grudge on that matter, ‘cos we’re diverse in nature. What I’m really tryin’ to say, is that my family and its members hardly see each other. Okay? Each of us was busy with our own responsibilities. I’ll give you a li’l insinuation on that issue. My second to the eldest sister lives somewhere in Manila while my youngest sister stays at our hometown in a province near Bataan. My mother, on the other hand, manages to settle in a community located in the Southern division of the country. Whereas my father, regularly works in an office situated in the North. Apparently, in my case, you can consider me as an NPA (a person with No Permanent Address) because I have ceaseless reasons to be one. To cut this story short, we were all separated from each other and the weekend getaway keeps us all together anywhere we choose to go.

God has a purpose

My first ever job application was like a whirlwind!

Everything was a whirlwind! The whole thing that happened to me for the past few days was as fast as a speed of light. I used such idiomatic expression because it all happened in high-speed and I felt happy about it in the beginning. It overpowered me to the extent that I almost breakdown from normal consciousness. From exhausting myself out of night out parties in my apartment, meeting a bunch of new “barkada” of a close friend in college, befalling insomnia attacks during night time while chit chatting with friends on-line, turning out to be an eating machine while staying sedentary at home, opening my heart again to someone who turn out to be so special to me, dying of anxiety upon waiting for a result that could change my whole perspective in life, nailing a first ever job application in just a day, and above all, falling into pieces after an unfortunate and heart-rending fiasco concerning my future career path. But I guess all good things will come to an end, eventually.

I have failed several times and I know that you know how it feels like to fail something in particular that you wouldn’t want to be unsuccessful with. As the saying goes, “only those who are asleep make no mistakes” which explains how I learn from others' frustrations but it is still my own failure that is going to teach me the most valuable lesson in life. 

HE had a reason for all of this. This wouldn't happen without his real purpose why it all occurred. GOD IS JUST REALLY GOOD. He all did this according to his plans. It was clearly polished and took off in the right track. I believe all of this because I have great faith in HIM. And I will always remain faithful to HIM all my life.

Living in the Underworld

The underworld is the place of the departed souls. Souls of the dead who have gone into the opposite side of the earth. It is located in the deepest part of the social sphere where souls of the organized crime were settled. Where my broken soul... lost and dispirited... should be given away.

FAILURE IS INEVITABLE. Failing in a specific time, place or event is like living in the underworld where dead people are confused, angry, helpless and bitter. It feels like your soul just wants to vanish in thin air -- or maybe dive in to the innermost part of the underworld where it is nowhere to be found. 

We are all aware that we could never run from life’s failure and letdowns. That’s why there is a Filipino axiom that says, “nasa huli ang pagsisisi” which is translated in english as, “in late repentance”. It is simply because no one ever wishes to fail in the beginning before they realize the true meaning of success in the end. We will suffer different challenges and sacrifices at first before establishing the right path towards success. "Kailangan muna nating madapa at masugatan bago tayo matuto sa’ting mga pagkakamali". In other words, you have to fall back upon humanity and God to enlarge your spirit, learn to stand up, rise and truly understand what success really mean.

I HATE IT WHEN I FAIL. Failing randomly in terms of the following:

1. Being late in class or meeting.

2.Participate in an important event in somebody’s life such as birthdays, victory parties or baptism invitations/christening.

3. Attend a major school activity, specifically, in the college where I belong (Nursing).

4. Tutor my little sister in her Math homework.

5. Missed a call from a special someone or significant other.

6. Iron my clothes neatly and tidily.

7. Fix my hair gorgeously before going out somewhere.

8. Finish my food in an ordinarily normal length of time.

9. Tell my parents stories about my love life and difficulty of work in the course that I have taken.

10. Ace a test.

The tenth random failure covers the most broad and extensive elucidation upon recently going through a foremost tragedy of failing. It is an awful disappointment that I myself hardly imagine that I will experience. I wouldn’t complicate you on its specificity but I assure you a definite heart-breaking aftermath on its subject matter. Things have been really tough for me nowadays and I would still like to make light of what to entail in this post. However, I would consider writing them in detail as soon as I am ready. 

Wish me luck! :)

Irresistible Trepidation

“Peeeks! Kinakabahan na ako. May result na daw kasi within 10 days. Positive result please! Huhuhu...”

This text message is sent to me by my very good college girl friend/former roomie peks Joyce Hermoso dated this cloudy afternoon in my hometown. Guess what I felt after reading this message? Ugh, jeez. The usual human anxiety sentiments such as palpitations, jitteriness, muscle tension, restlessness, and worry. Just like any nursing graduate who took this Licensure Exam for Nursing and also went along all through this process. This paralytic fear that anyone wouldn’t want to feel either, keeps on getting into my nerves. It spoils my HAPPINESS. I even hear voices in my head where my angel talks big about how successful I may be after I pass this test whilst my devil brags on how my world would crash if I may not succeed in this vast trial. Please be considerate of me writing all this drama!

The NLE (Nursing Licensure Examinations) is just a massive deal for me. Mainly, because I suppose I behaved well when I was in college. IKR? Yes, I mean behaved well because I always think of how hard it is for my parents to raise a lot of expenses just to get me into college. As a consequence, I maintained being apprehensive and mindful of my actions and responsibilities while on board. That is what I meant of unmaliciously well behaved I was. Okay. I’ve entered the college of nursing studying its art and moulding myself on being a good and professional nurse someday. I did not aspire for this career path but I have benefited from it. I eventually learned how to love and appreciate it as well. I even got fixated in studying its ethics, specialty, and consecration that led me to desire to study in Med school. Which is I hope, I could take up depending on my family’s financial statements.

I constantly question myself each time I reflect on how hard it is... to wait. Specifically, that is to wait for the NLE results.

Does this examination really judge you on how bright and clever you are? Does this improve your sexiness and will beautify you to the eyes of other people? Does this test proclaim your success or failure in life? Would your parents still be proud of you? Would your friends still be there for you no matter what the result might be? Would you be able to tell God that you’re faithful enough and very blessed that you’ve faced this challenge? All this I asked every single day upon waiting, waiting and waiting until the final verdict of this exam comes out.

I’m just perfectly scared, loved, fearful and happy right now... And this is my irresistible trepidation. 

To God be the Glory!

A Nurse’s Echo.

“NLE Results will be out anytime in between the dates of August 20 to 22”.

This statement that came from a specific review center just shocks the hell out of me and got me into panic!

What I mean is, this repetitive act of significant persons (known in nursing profession) who post dates of NLE results in their Facebook wall is kind of scarring our asses out. Particularly, we, fresh nursing graduates who took the Nursing Licensure Exams last July 2 and 3, 2011. This feeling that I can never really explain until you feel it for yourself is exceedingly mind-blowing. Jeez, I can hardly imagine myself on the day that the results will be out in the internet, newspaper and on television news. This is what I consider as “bitay” or “reclusion perpetua” according to law books. Man, I just needed to blog this and let this out of my head because right now, I am really really scared.

WHOAAAA I NEEDED THIS. I need to shout and blow my own trumpet. Please Lord, let me do this. Allow me to reach my dreams and aspirations as a good nurse. Present me reality. I want to prove myself how far can I go? How bright I may be? I want to acknowledge my own great abilities. I want to maximize my true potentials. And that is... I believe that is... to be an RN this 2011.

Desperate it may seem but yes, this is my echo, a true Nurse’s echo. MAY GOD BLESS US ALL FUTURE RNs of 2011. =)

B for Beautiful People.

Have you ever felt being surrounded with beautiful people? Technically, I am talking about people who are smart, stylish and well-bred. If yes, I adore you! If no, well, I think we’ll have a mammoth chatter about that some other time. ;)

It is a long forgotten saying that, “you are who your friends are”. And yeah, I strongly believe on that. You go along with peers who you influence and get influenced with. I mean influence, because they encourage you depending on what are their day to day routines when they wake up early in the morning, what they desire to eat for a certain meal, how they dress and look in front of a mirror, how they talk and communicate in front of other people and a lot more of physiological and psychological factors that we generally consider.

I have left 4 attractive women in Manila. 3 of them became my former classmates in College and certainly, became my roommates in an apartment somewhere in Quiapo, Manila. While the other 1, is a former group mate in one of our subjects in College and of course, a very good friend of mine. And I call them, the B’s of my Life. :)

Why call ‘em B’s? B’s ‘cos obviously, we have nicknames for each other that starts with the letter B. Don’t ask me why the letter B ‘cos I don’t know either. Haha! 

Let me introduce to you, my B – GIRLS:

(Christine, Aira, Alminna, Dianne, Charmain)

CHRISTINE Joyce Baas a.k.a. BUFF

One word to describe her: Reserved

Buff is everyone’s big sister. Apparently, because she’s tall, curvaceous and chinita-cute (bolera ako), anyone can easily approach and ask her for a cup of coffee while chit chatting about random things in life. She obeys rules, will protect her friends as long as she can and is always open for support. Seeing as her parents are both strict, nonetheless, she never forgets to reserve her time and energy for friends, family, and other VIPs on her list. Count on her in maintaining her posts and status updates about momentous event of adventure and fun. FREE HUGS from Buff =))

CHARM Velchez Isidoro a.k.a. BIM

One word to describe her: Caring

We all care for our loved ones but Bim cares ALL THE TIME. You’ll never know if Dickson, her tall, dark and handsome (bolera nga ako) boyfriend, gets jealous with her girl friend’s friends because Bim haven’t noticed that she forgot to reply on Dicky’s text message because she has been busy making sure that everyone is okay and doing good. Most of the time, she takes good care of us by feeding us with her great recipes. Ohh yeah, she cooks an excellent and appetizing meal. Being compassionate, Bim gets too soft-hearted if anything goes wrong with her friends, family and even in her clothes from the laundry. Baby please don’t goooo...

AIRA Therese Dantes a.k.a. BOOM

One word to describe her: Authoritative

Boom is our ANG MOM. We call her ANG MOM not because she already looks like a mom or old enough to be a mom. But for the reason, that her mom taught her to be a firm decision maker. Not surprisingly, because she has embraced her mom’s character being a good teacher. Let’s just put it this way, we (her roomies) are her students, and she is our teacher. She sings her own praises just to wake us up early in the morning and prepare our breakfast before going out to review. Although being MASA (masandal tulog), yet she never fail to finish her skin care routine before she goes to sleep. Now you know why Choco (Boom’s boyfriend) admires her so much!

DIANNE Esyrel Casiquin a.k.a. BAM

One word to describe her: Problem-solver

“Let’s think of a valid reason, para hindi tayo ma-GG kay daddy”. That’s one of her most frequent lines that we often hear from her if we’re caught in between a difficult situation. Especially in those instances that we’re in a hub of mesmerizing a moment of laughter and absolute enjoyment with close friends and apartment neighbours. It is because sometimes, we suddenly don’t expect a pay visit from Bam’s parents that will lead us all to Plan B, which perchance, alter our entire night’s plans. In the long run, she will kick up a fuss of explanation and valid reasons straight away over the phone, till we sing and shout, PARTY ROCKIN’ IN THE HOUSE TONIGHT!!!

Craving for FOOD.

 Ganito ba talaga kapag walang love life?

I crave for this chocolate.

You only crave for something? Like FOOD? Who will ever believe me if I say that I ONLY crave for food? Maybe YOU who barely know me, my friends in FB (facebook) or even my closest friends wouldn't accept that statement. Jeez, what I'm only tryin' to say is that I am splendidly craving for chocolates (specifically that KitKat white chocolate on the right side) this past few days. I am in love with them and yes they make me feel satiated and happy. Perhaps because I don't have someone who I can crave for in exchange to this lovely chocolates. Ha-ha! You'll never know. =P

I value my course.

Currently, I am thinking of 5 proposals (5 having the highest priority) on what to do with my life after finishing school. That is a genuinely HUGE question for everyone who've successfully finished their studies from Nursery to College but unfortunately, are unemployed. 

In my case as a nursing graduate, those are my plans either after passing the board exams and striking an excellent board rating or after passing the board exams and nailing it to the top. TO THE TOP. Oh yes, that is what you call self-efficacy (which is defined in Wikipedia as a person's belief in their own competence). Ha-ha to the nice-to-know definition. I know, both of my choices are positive disregarding the negative (like failing the boards and all that exhausting ideas) because all I need to think of right now is what am I going to do with my life?

Proposal #1: Enter a Call Center Agency

Particularly in JP Morgan Chase located at The Fort where my Godmother (who is also an RN) is working as a Call Center Trainer, IBM Makati and the other companies that are numerous and too well-known to mention.

Proposal #2: Study in Med school

I want to be a doctor but I never dreamt to be one when I was a kid, just like how I've never imagine finishing Nursing as my career path. Occasionally, because I really wanted to take up Linguistics and Communication Arts. I don't know really. I just feel this energy that I still wish to build up my knowledge in the field of medicine.

Proposal #3: Take the NCLEX-RN Exams (National Council Licensure Examination for Registered Nurses)

Aiming to take this exams is one of my goals after I complete the mandatory requirements needed in the country as a Registered Nurse. I need (and not want) to travel abroad and covet for a good job with appropriate salary according to my competency.

Proposal #4: Study MAN (Masters of Arts in Nursing)

Upon searching on the internet, it is said that this program is designed to prepare qualified nurses in the Philippines and abroad for clinical specialization. Basically, this would add on into your qualifications as a Registered Nurse. My dad aspires me to become a Forensic Nurse (an example of a clinical specialization) which is only open for training and education in the U.S.

Proposal #5: Submit an application as a Volunteer Nurse

Unfortunately, nursing job opportunities in the country has been down for several years. Despite the nurse exploitation that are seen in the news, I would still be glad to be a nurse volunteer not because it is a requirement before you become authorized to work abroad, but because I want to face reality. This may sound so plastic but yeah, I value my course and I can be forced to do it.

No one taught me how to web log.

EVERYONE have their own thoughts, ideas and insights. Some, LIKE ME, just do not know how to deeply convey with it. While some, LIKE YOU, expresses himself/herself in a simple and uncomplicated manner.

I started web logging since I was in Grade 6. No one taught me how to web log. Until I explored it on my own and created what we call now as an Online Blog. Hell yeah, I am soo back to business!

Thank you bessy, Donna Krizel Palma, and girl friend foreva, Asabelle Camenforte who both own a dramatically meaningful blog which was preciously melodic and unfuckenbelievable that moved me to write once more.

I LOVE YOU GIRLS SO MUCH <3